Why oh why?!?!?!?

I can't believe this is happening - I don't even know what is happening but all these situations are running through my head. Of all the places in all the world - why oh why did there have to be bombs in Bangkok? A normally very peaceful place - and now who knows. This could change everything - it could change nothing - but unless it's figured out who, what and why these bombs are all about I can't imagine it not changing things.

I was just starting to think about contact our agnecy again - about having them email and question the TRC about our paperwork and how things are progressing with their timeline. It's been 6 weeks - that's when they said the report should be finished. How patient can they expect us to be? I've been thinking beyond the referral lately - thinking of travel and bringing home our boy. Knowing that the paperwork was just a minor step waiting to happen. Thinking it would happen anytime now - but now......what if this changes everything? What if he's forced to sit there for months more and I'm forced to sit here being able to control nothing and not get to him and be with him? I have so many thoughts running through my head I can't even sort them out. My heart is breaking into a million pieces just at the idea of something going wrong at this point. Something causing an even bigger delay or worse......god, I can't even think about worse.

This is not how I wanted to ring in the new year.